


man's quaint little race

by supervisorhob (caughtinkhanded)



Series: things you said [5]
Category: The Black Tapes Podcast
Genre: Ambiguous Character Death, Angst, F/M, Heavy Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-04
Updated: 2018-01-04
Packaged: 2019-02-28 00:53:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13260180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/caughtinkhanded/pseuds/supervisorhob
Summary: things you said when you were scared;Your hands were so sticky. And wet.You dropped them against your abdomen and let out a cry at the sharp pain. There was so much blood.Why was there so much blood?





	man's quaint little race

**Author's Note:**

> title from dessa's "momento mori"
> 
> some vague AU from the season 3 finale.

 

 

Everything hurt.

 

Something was very wrong. Something had gone wrong. How could it have gone wrong? You were the heroes of this story. It was the oldest story in the world, good versus evil, good always wins.

 

But everything hurt.

 

You stared down at your hands. They were covered in blood. Your first thought went to Richard, but he was standing in front of you. He wasn’t bleeding. But his eyes were filled with something that scared you. He was terrified.

 

“Richard?” You choked out. Your voice wasn’t working properly. Words were catching in your throat. A swell of panic was steadily building in your chest.

 

Suddenly the earth was moving. Everything was spinning. You stumbled backwards, your shoulders colliding painfully with a wall.

 

Richard was on you in a flash. His hands, which you had always admired a bit too much, cushioned your shoulders as he guided you towards the floor.

 

Your gaze fell to your bloody hands again.

 

“What-what happened? Are y-y-you okay?” You stammered out. The sound of your own voice scared you. “There was a-a-a gunshot.”

 

“Alex.” His voice was soft, softer than you had ever heard it. It sounded like a lover’s voice, not a work colleague’s. Your heart pounded painfully.

 

Your hands were so sticky. And wet.

 

You dropped them against your abdomen and let out a cry at the sharp pain. There was so much blood.

 

Why was there so much blood?

 

“Blo-blood.” You gasped, pain emanating from your core. “Hur-hurts.” A hot tear burned its way down your cheek.

 

“Shh, Alex, it’s going to be okay.” He brushed a few finger tips across your cheek bone. “It’s going to be okay, darling.”

 

“D-darling?” You choked out, hating yourself for being weak in this moment. But everything hurt. Your eyes were getting fuzzier. It hurt to keep them open. You tried to focus on Richard, but he wasn’t staying still.

 

Richard pursed his lips as he stared down at you. There was an unfamiliar softness about him. “Alex, you have to hold on.”

 

“Thought you were gone. Thought you left me. You gave up.”

 

“Sh, no, Alex, I could never give up on you. I was trying to protect you. That’s why I’m here.” He paused, shifting one of his hands to your abdomen. “But I was late. I’m so sorry, darling.”

 

“’s my fault.”

 

“No, it’s not, Alex, none of this was your fault.”

 

“Yes, it ‘as. I shouln’t’ve lied to you.”

 

“You never lied to me.”

 

“Didn’t tell you the truth.” You wanted to close your eyes. They felt itchy and they hurt. It was like a heavy blanket had been put over you. “’m tired.”

 

“Alex, no, you need to stay with me. Help’s on its way. You just need hold on. Hold on, please. What didn’t you tell me?”

 

“Shouldn’t say.” You protest. Even as you lay bleeding out in his arms, it doesn’t seem like it’s the right time. Never has been the right times. It’s been years now. Why change your behavior now?

 

“Alex, please,” he’s begging now and it tugs at your heart. But then he’s taking off his sweater, some fancy cashmere that looks so nice with his eyes. He pressed it against you and it’s like you’re burning up. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” He keeps repeating. “Alex, keep talking. You’re always talking, don’t stop now.”

 

“’m not ‘ways talkin’.” You manage and your throat feels like it’s on fire. There’s a bad taste in your mouth and you’re pretty sure it’s blood.

 

“Oh yes you are. That was the first thing I fell in love with, your voice. When I heard your messages, there was something about your voice.”

 

“L-l-love?”

 

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier.” He’s cradling your head with one hand while the other is applying pressure to your wound. “I was afraid.”

 

“Me too.”

 

“Of me?”

 

“’re scary sometimes.” You cough weakly, blood spilling over your lip. “’m scared.” He closes his eyes in pain and you want to comfort him, but your body’s not listening to you anymore. “I don’t wanna die.”

 

“You’re not dying today, Alexandra Reagan, I’m not letting you.” He declares, even as his eyes fill with tears.

 

“’s’not my name.”

 

“What?”

 

“My name’s s’not Alexandra.” You close your eyes for a moment and it feels so much better.

 

“Alex! Alex, no, you can’t shut your eyes.” You blink owlishly open, staring up at this man who you are so painfully in love with. “Tell me about your name.”

 

“Hm, oh yeah, my dad messed it up on my birth certificate. Was supps’ed to be Alexandra. Dad’s got bad handwriting and it looked like an extra i. So my name’s actually Alexandria,” you trail off, words becoming even more challenging to find.

 

“Like the library?”

 

“Uh-huh. ‘s funny though, I think he did it on purpose, he’s an English teacher.”

 

“So that’s where you get your way with words?”

 

“Mom’s workin’ for a charity right now, so yeah.”

 

“What was your favorite book when you were a child?”

 

You frown, wondering why he would ask that while you were dying. “Hm, always liked Charlie and the- the- the-“ You couldn’t remember and the panic began to boil over. It was so hard to breathe.

 

“Chocolate Factory?” You nod. “Charlie loved that one too. It had her name in it.”

 

“Wish I could’ve actually met ‘er.”

 

“Charlie? I think she would like you. I’m sure Charlie will come around eventually. Maybe next Christmas.”

 

You manage a smile, even though your mouth tastes like blood. “Don’t think there’s going to be a next Chris’mas.”

 

“Alex, you’re going to make it. You’re going to be okay. Help is on its way.”

 

You finally manage to reach a hand up to his face. His skin is so warm. “’re in the middle of nowhere. I don’t think I have enough time. Wasted too much time.”

 

“Shh, no, we still have so much to do, Alex.”

 

“’m sorry.” Your fingers spread across his cheek and they’re so red with your blood. “Love you.”

 

“Alex! Alex!” You hear your name, but you can’t keep your eyes open anymore. They’re too heavy.

 

Everything hurts.

 

And then it doesn’t. 

**Author's Note:**

> i'll leave it up to you guys what happens afterward... 
> 
> i'm so sorry - this is a lot of angst. 
> 
> come say hey @ frozenarya
> 
> -ebh


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